Treasure In An Attic

This week, on a rainy, raw Monday, I decided to begin a purging of our attic.  I was inspired by the days I spent helping my parents sort through fifty plus years of belongings before they moved into a smaller home this past summer.  Out of sight, out of mind is very true in this case.  When an unused toy, decoration, or treasure is squirreled away in a dark attic, there it stays until a moving day comes along and the dusty boxes require decisions to be made: keep it, give it away or throw it away. It's a huge job.  This burden of stuff.  But that will be for another discussion.

So Monday, in the spirit of traveling this life journey of mine with less baggage and for sharing the memories that might be hiding in my attic, I opened the attic door and took stock.  I saw boxes of Christmas decorations, a highchair and crib, Easter baskets, luggage and many boxes and bins holding toys and school memorabilia belonging to Jeremy and Maria.  I decided I would start with Jeremy's bins.  Since he and Mechelle have their own attic as homeowners, I would relinquish to them the keepers of his memories. 

Lugging bins downstairs, I found he had an elementary bin, a high school bin and a college bin. 

There was a box of trophies.

 

And a bin of greeting cards he received through the years.

 

  In this bin was where I lost myself a rainy Monday in November. As I sorted and read cards it became apparent to me that our son was the recipient of much love, prayers and nurture in the village that surrounded him through family, school, neighborhood and church.  I was overwhelmed with the blessing of this community.  Realization dawned that Kevin and I had so much support as Jeremy's (and Maria's) parents. The support we took for granted at the time, but now, with 20/20 vision looking in the rearview mirror and documented in the saved cards, it was undeniably influential in our lives as parents. 

I started sorting cards in piles.  The cards on top were the most recent and they included sweet ones from his then girlfriend, Mechelle--I didn't read them, well, not all of them...no surprises, just reminded me again what a treasure our daughter-in-love is to our son and to our family.  Sweet Love.

I found cards from Maria to her brother.  I was reminded of the special relationship they had growing up together.  They were a team.  They sometimes remind me that we brainwashed them.  We would tell them they have to work things out.... someday they won't have Dad and me but they'll have each other so, Be Kind!  And, with God working in their little hearts, they got it.  Now a team of three, they enjoy a love and friendship that runs deep in their souls.  Siblings are a treasure and our first opportunities to figure out how to live and love together.  Sibling love.

Another pile of cards grew quickly, those from the Grands.  The Grands are Jeremy's grandparents Horning and Martin.  He received cards on e.v.e.r.y holiday.  With cute pictures of bikes, deer, drums or fishing rods.

 

  Boy things.  But inside the cards, handwritten notes of love, pride in his choices, and encouragement for growing well. He had, and still has, such cheerleaders in the Grands.  These carefully chosen cards reflect the very active presence they had in Jeremy's life, his milestones and his accomplishments.  They attended concerts, sports activities, graduations, and blessed Kevin and I with countless hours of babysitting when the children were young. Jeremy is blessed as he still has their very active presence in his life.  So much unconditional love.

The next pile wasn't big but the weight of wisdom and love contained in the cards was pure gold.  This stack of cards was from the GreatGrands.  Jeremy was fortunate to know two great-grandfathers and four great-grandmothers.  He tells me his memory is sketchy and he doesn't know what he actually remembers of them and what is from pictures and stories.  But they knew and treasured his little life. My maternal grandmother, Grandma Good, wrote loving notes in her cards to Jeremy.  Words that reflected many years of faith in God and the joy in choosing to serve Him.

She faithfully prayed for my family and she and grandpa loved when we would drop "the children" off to play at their home while Kevin and I attended a Bible study or elder team meeting.  The wealth of collective life experience in the GreatGrands and their encouragement of our boy is a legacy cherished.  Ageless love.

The stack of cards from aunts, uncles and cousins grew. I recalled the countless hours Jeremy played with his Martin and Horning cousins.  He had a circle of playmates, rich in imagination and energy, to learn about give-and-take, sharing and negotiation.  All of it in the safe and secure boundaries of a grandparent's or aunt's and uncle's care.  Family love.

Their were greeting cards from next-door neighbors, coaches, his drum teacher and his schoolteachers.  Cards that expressed respect, encouragement and blessing.   Thoughtful notes of care were added to the pile from youth group leaders and Sunday School teachers. Then I noticed how many cards were added to the stack from his prayer partners from church.  Jeremy was privileged to have prayer support from two wise older men from New Life Fellowship, Luke Landis and Marty Longenecker.  Both men have since moved to heaven, but the notecards, the words of love and faith...I'm blinking back tears as I type.  These men would notice in the newspaper when Jeremy made honor roll and affirm him.  They encouraged his participation on our worship team at church as the drummer.  Jeremy knew they were praying over him daily.  Jeremy knew they cared about his life.  Community love.

I found cards from Kevin and me with handwritten words that barely captured the depth of love in our hearts for our beloved son.  We verbalized daily our love for him and were intentional in speaking out loud our pride and joy in his being.  Being our boy, our terrific teen, our son!  These colorful papers document our journey as his parents, celebrating the seasons in his life and our growing, deepening relationships  from dependent infant to independent adult.  More unconditional love.

More tears moistened my eyes when, at the bottom of the bin, I found the congratulatory cards sent to us on the birth of our bouncing baby boy.  I spied handwriting I recognized, handwriting I hadn't seen in awhile, from my Aunt Sherrill.  Aunt Sherrill had the gift for sending thoughtful notes and cards.  We had to say good-bye to her when Jesus took her home to heaven this past September, but her words speak to us still.  In the two page note to us, she quoted a blessing friends sent her on the birth of her son,

"May your precious gift from heaven always know the meaning of true happiness and laughter, companionship and love.  May you find that day by day your lives are richer too.  Because that precious little gift was sent by God to you."

Generations of love.

Jeremy learned about true happiness, laughter, companionship and love from all these people who so generously and kindly invested in his life.  And most assuredly Kevin and I have experienced the priceless joys of being Jeremy's parents, this precious gift from God.  But one thing is clear, each one of us had a choice as to how we would use our lives to invest in his.  We could choose to be present or absent, to speak words of life or words of death, to nurture or to destroy.  Sobering, this powerful influence we wield.

This bin full of memories reminded me of some very important things.  These cards represented to me ordinary people who chose to invest in an infant, then a child, then a teen, then a man (as well as his parents!). It reminded me that our words matter.  Our presence matters.  Our prayers matter.  The time we take to encourage and affirm, to mentor and to teach, to play, pray and listen matters.  When we invest a thread of our love in the tapestry that makes up an individual's life, we cooperate with God in His purposes for them.  I am overwhelmed with the wonder of it all. It is serious business, this loving one another.  I am reminded of the classic Christmas movie, "It's A Wonderful Life" and the discovery of the main character, George, that his life made a powerful difference in the outcome of other's lives.  We must leverage our influence in the lives of others for their good and God's glory.  People matter.  Stuff, not so much. 

"It's far easier to raise strong sons than heal broken men."  Frederick D.

Our son Jeremy is a good, kind, loving, giving, humble darling of a man!  I may be a bit biased (just a tad bit), but the investment into his life from the village around him is reaping huge dividends.  He loves Jesus, his wife and family with all of his heart.  He is a man of integrity.  He knows what the important things in life consist of...people and God Almighty.  Our roles as Jeremy's parents were easier because of those who invested in our son's life, supporting our parenting and speaking truth and grace over him.  I have a heart full of gratitude as I type these words. 

The Grands, Jeremy and Mechelle, Maria, and Kevin at the head of the table.

 

 



My attic is a little emptier.  But there is another bin of cards...our sweet Maria's bin of love, loaded with documentation of all those dear ones who invested in her life.....that will be for another rainy day.