Winter Peace

I braved the wind chill yesterday and enjoyed a short walk along my creek.  The sun was brilliant but not much warmth trumped the artic blast.  I wanted to capture the frozen water topped with a dusting of snow.  I'm sure our creek has been frozen in  the twenty years we have lived along it's banks but I haven't imprinted it on my mind or recorded it with my camera. Yesterday I did.  It is beautiful.  This is what the creek looked like last week before the record breaking cold.

And this is what she looked like at 3:30 yesterday afternoon. 

And downstream.

"Silver white winters that melt into Spring....these are a few of my favorite things."

I watched a squirrel scamper across this log to the other side.

 
He was much too fast for my gloved hands operating the camera so you'll have to imagine it.  There were all sorts of footprints in the snow, not all of the human kind.  I think we should invest in a trail camera just to see what might show up down by the creek while we are sleeping.


I didn't last outside but about twenty minutes. My legs were feeling the cold right through my jeans. But I soaked in the stillness and peace of the wintry landscape.

 

  I will enjoy Spring as much as anyone, but the simplicity of winter speaks to my soul and I am savoring the views.

"In repentance and rest is your salvation, in quietness and trust is your strength."  Isaiah 30:15

I love candlelight any time of the year, but on a cold winter evening it is most lovely. 

 

"Your word is a lamp to my feet (my present) and a light for my path (my future)."  Psalm 199:105. My thought in italics.

My mom had her right knee replaced on Monday. She suffered with pain for several years.  Seventeen months ago she had her left knee replaced with great results and it was time to tackle the other one.   I am privileged to be her advocate and support while in the hospital and now a coach and encourager while she recovers at home.  She is a compliant patient.  Mom doesn't fight the healing journey but surrenders to the work and trusts the process of physical therapy, pain management, good nutrition and rest.  She is an example to me of patiently waiting for healing while doing her part to facilitate it.  This example of trust applies to healing of all kinds, physical, emotional, mental or spiritual healing. We do our part and trust God to do His.  Her sense of humor is intact, also helpful in the healing journey.  It's a good idea not to take yourself too seriously.  She gave Dad and I some good laughs the first day at home as she was a touch loopy from the pain medication and lack of uninterrupted sleep.  She told someone on the phone that she likes people to be cheerful and was doing her part to help that day.

I am blessed to observe the devoted care my father gives my mom.  He is tender with her, carefully recording the times she gets her pain meds, applying the ice pack to her knee, listening for her at night if she needs anything, and preparing simple meals.  After 54 years of marriage, love gets deeper and sweeter.  They celebrated their anniversary on the 11th of February, five days before her surgery. 

I have been blessed to have been nurtured in the legacy of grandparents and parents committed to marriage, family and Jesus Christ and His church.  It is what Kevin and I are committed to living out for our children and the grandchildren we are praying over that are yet to come!

I finished one of my Christmas books this week. 

 

The one by Wendell Berry, Jayber Crow.  It is a gentle, thought-provoking and entertaining novel about the life story of Jayber Crow, barber and member of the Port William community written in his voice.  I will be reading more from this author. This is one of my favorite paragraphs from the novel,

"Now I have had most of the life I am going to have, and I can see what it has been.  I can remember those early years when it seemed to me I was cut completely adrift, and times when, looking back at earlier times, it seemed I had been wandering in the dark woods of error.  But now it looks to me as though I was following a path that was laid out for me, unbroken, and maybe even as straight as possible, from one end to the other, and I have this feeling, which never leaves me anymore, that I have been led."

Don't you just love the poetry of those words. And their meaning resonates deep in my spirit.  "For it is God who works in you to will and to act according to his good purpose." the Word states in Philippians 2:13.  And Isaiah 46:3-4, "you whom I have upheld since you were conceived, and have carried since birth.  Even to your old age and gray hairs I am he, I am he who will sustain you.  I have made you and I will carry you; I will sustain you and I will rescue you." says our God.  Sweet words to my soul!

I have enjoyed God's presence and beauty this week.  I hope you too are savoring your journey and mining the treasure in your life.

"You are an unceasing spiritual being with an eternal destiny in God's great universe." 

(painting by my brother-in-law, Jonathan Buch)

Learning Contentment

Something has begun to change in me as I have started thinking about my days in terms of what I could record in story form in this blog. There has been a shift in my viewfinder as I've lingered in thoughts and savored my "world", trying to articulate what matters to me.  I am experiencing a deeper contentment with my life.  But definitely not complacency as I have been stirred to imagine growing in many ways.  It didn't take long for me to notice this change as I've only published a handful of posts.  But my experience validated what a continuing education course I took in 2013 taught.  The Word of God also confirms what I've experienced.

For the past two years Kevin and I have dreamed about moving to another home with potential to realize some of our longings.  Kevin longs for a larger workshop for his woodturning, furniture making hobby.

  A property with room to stack his wood collection but not too big that he would have more yard care or maintenance.  That would take away from his hobby time.  He would enjoy an old farmhouse that he could build kitchen cabinets, add artistic wood trim, and reveal the natural beauty of wood to his hearts content throughout the place.  A house like that would be his artist's "canvas".  As for me, I think a fireplace would be the cat's meow for creating a cozy home with a huge gathering room for people plus a space for potential in-law quarters as needed. And trees.  A woodland would create the right environment for this girl. All of these dreams have had us looking at real estate advertisements, going for Sunday afternoon drives, imagining how we could finance our visions for the future.  Arranging and rearranging the possibilities.  We tried not to be discontent with our home but "The Dream" had us restless.   On our sabbatical last summer one take-away for me was to begin writing.  A dream of mine not dependent on fireplaces or woodlands.

I began spending time keeping company with Jesus, being still and meditating on Him and a section of the scriptures.  While the weather was warm and sunny I often sat outside.  I embraced slowing down, not hurrying thorough my days.  I tried to be mindful of moments, really seeing my surroundings, enjoying my health, family, friends and home.  I started to savor the view out my car window as I motored about going here and there. When I ran, I looked about with an eye as to what picture would capture my feeling that day.  My life began to unfold in my eyes like a story.  Our spiritual directors at Potters Inn would tell us that our life stories are sacred.  As they sat with us and asked us about our stories, actively listening, we sensed in a fresh way our belovedness to God.  Experiencing those moments of being heard confirmed in our hearts the importance of being with people and listening to their stories with empathetic hearts.  Sometimes that is enough for someone to take courage and go at life again.  Their pain (or confusion or joy or sadness or disappointment or hopes or dreams) was validated in the eyes of the engaged listener and it tells them they matter, they have been seen.

In my own fresh practice of savoring my life with appreciation and the lens of my little canon camera or smartphone something began to shift.  My satisfaction with my home grew.  Instead of being frustrated with my home's limitations I could appreciate what it offered us, warmth and sanctuary.

 Instead of longing for a rustic house in a big woods I notice how precious my view out the back of our house is to me, the creek that meanders through the fields and trees and sparkles in the sunlight.  This creek has provided hours of fun for our children; fishing, swimming, rearranging rocks, hunting crayfish.

 

  The Muddy Creek has been my friend for the past twenty years.  The sounds of water rippling over the rocks comes through our open bedroom windows during the summer, sending me off to dreamland.   I noticed how often I now thanked God for our third of an acre of paradise, grateful that He planted us here and ashamed that I had valued the gift so little. Writing and illustrating (in a limited way) what is happening in my life these days has released in my soul an deeper love for my Jesus, my family and friends, my church, my home....my life.  It is an extravagant gift. This abundant life I live has less to do with my possessions and more to do with my perspective.  Let me assure you that this continues to be a journey for me because I do appreciate possessions and comfort.

I remember what I learned at a conference in 2013 on Developing Positive Emotional Habits, sponsored by the Institute for Brain Potential and presented by Brian E. King, Ph.D. One of the emotional habits of happy people, he says, is reflecting on joy filled states of being, such as in making photo albums or scrapbooks or reminiscing with friends and family.  Dr. King stated that "When you tell a story about your life, it encourages you to live a better story."  As I understand this,  it is not that you are creating a fake person in how you present to the world, masks and all, but instead it is way of being in which you "strive to create positive hopes and expectations."  His words not mine in those quotation marks.  One of the interventions taught at this seminar is developing the habit of savoring.  It is the practice of looking about and noting the things you take for granted, being mindful of the good feelings these produce and thoroughly enjoying them.  Dr. King writes, " Happiness does not lie in the things themselves but in the relish we have of them." My experience in writing this blog gives witness to the change in my heart as I have become more focused on my present circumstances instead of living in longing for some future ideal.

I've been soaking in the gospel of Luke the past month and these words of Jesus have been reverberating in my soul.  I read from my beloved NIV then often reread the same words from The Message.

These are a smattering of phrases from Luke 12:22-32 that call us to savor what matters, to be fully present in our lives, in the paraphrased words of  The Message,

"Look at the ravens, free and unfettered, not tied down to a job description, carefree in the care of God.  And you count far more......Walk into the fields and look at the wildflowers.  They don't fuss with their appearance-but have you ever seen color and design quite like it?......What I'm trying to do here is to get you to relax, not be so preoccupied with getting so you can respond to God's giving....Steep yourself in God-reality, God-initiative, God-provisions. You'll find all your human concerns met.  Don't be afraid of missing out.  You're my dearest friends!"

I am enjoying contentment deep in my soul....most days.  It is a journey I am on, this being present and responsive to God's daily gifts to me.  It is a satisfying place to live.

"Be grateful for the home you have, knowing that at this moment, all you have is all you need."

                        Sarah Ban Breathnack